legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
