community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
