This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize