we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
