Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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