if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
