found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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