She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
