worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Randomize
