i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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