I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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