she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize