So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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