How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i just google imaged poop.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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