Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Randomize