don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
