I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
