I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
My ATM looks so different sober.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize