so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
