i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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