i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I am one with the molecules
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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