Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
