a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
