Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
