Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
