So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize