The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
