Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
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