Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
