I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Randomize
