Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
