I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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