but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
