Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I can't turn off my feet"
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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