did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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