I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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