Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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