Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize