I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
