Moan for me like Helen Keller
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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