My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize