OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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