I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
