she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize