I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize
