Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she peed on how many people?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
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