sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
