:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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