We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
