real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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