Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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