I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
